St. Clair was a little too loud.
St. Clair was a little too loud, and a few too many people laughed.
St. Clair was a little too loud, and a few too many people laughed, and the boss finally realized that someone was talking about him behind his back.
I wasn’t even involved; I’d just been sitting there. But as soon as the laughter subsided, he came over and asked what was so funny. Nobody said anything.
His expression was still flat, still emotionless, but he was starting to sweat. He asked again, louder. And nobody said anything. He finally dispensed with all pretenses, and demanded to know who’d started making fun of him.
Nobody looked at St. Clair. She said she didn’t know, becoming the picture of innocence. I felt the eyes starting to burn into the back of my head.
He yelled for about three minutes straight. The office was deathly quiet again. Quiet like the subway. Everyone was watching again, like the subway. I closed my eyes but I kept seeing that Eye, the dog, the jury. The lights behind my eyelids became those horrid points of light. My head began to throb. My chest started seizing up the more I thought about it, I started breathing in and out faster and faster and faster-
And I guess that’s why he heard me. That’s why he asked me who’d started talking. I wasn’t really present, mentally; I was still freaking out. The small part of my brain that was still there was relieved, and I thought for a moment that I’d be unable to do as ordered.
But the bite on my chest flared up. It felt like something was holding my ribcage in place, forcing the air out of my lungs, forcing the truth out of my mouth.
And all the eyes filled with anger and disgust again, just like the subway, when I said St. Clair’s name.
There was this sick look of something vaguely resembling triumph when he heard the name. He turned on her, and began calmly berating her in that even, psychotic tone. I was allowed to resume panicking as he leveled judgement at the friend who’d stood by me for three years. I caught her stare as I began to seize up again.
Now, all the eyes I see are green and full of hurt and revulsion every time they look at me.
Those eyes hurt me almost as much as the Other one.
Almost.
